Friday, January 9, 2009

"But That's Not Fair!"

Tonight my girls had planned to spend the night at their favorite cousins house. But, then Erica got sick and stayed home from school today. So, she can't go spend the night. So, the age old dilemma runs through my mind. . . do I keep them both home, or let her sister go without her? It's a sticky situation when your dealing with twins. Their whole life is shared with each other.

And I remember the first year I separated them in school, I warned them that being in separate classes & having separate friends now meant that their sister would probably be invited someplace without them, as well as the other way around. And even though you know it's coming, and prepare them ahead of time, when it happens, your still bound to hear the dreaded "But, that's not fair!" "Why does she get to go & I don't?"

So, I had a plan. And of course like we knew it was bound to, it happened. Lexi was invited to a friends Birthday party from school and Erica wasn't since she wasn't in that class. So, to prevent the tears, and one twin sitting home alone knowing her sister is at a party having a good time, we had planned for Daddy to take Erica out to see a movie while I took Lexi to the party. It worked out great! Everyone was happy. Then the very next week, Erica happened to be invited to a Birthday party with out Lexi, so I took Lexi to see the same movie Erica had seen the week before. (I love it when a plan comes together!)

But, now that the girls are older, they do more things without the other one, and it's fine. But, I still feel bad when one is sick and doesn't get to do something special, like tonight. But as we were talking about it, we realized another time when they were going to spend the night with Rachel, (their cousin) Lexi was sick and Erica got to go by herself. So, I guess it all works itself out, fair or not!

Lexi, Erica & Rachel a few years ago, ages 5 & 7
(Rachel's now 13, and the girls are 11!)


stefanie said...

It's not just twins. Our girls are two years apart in school, but they pull out the 'fair' card quite often. We call it the 'f' word!

It is great when there are equal opportunities, but as they get older they really are living more individual lives. It will be interesting to see how that works itself out with your girls.

Charity Childs-Gevero said...

Hey, Star! :) How are you? :)

Hey, I didn't know you have twins! :) What's it like? :) It must be such a handful when they're newborns and still in diapers! But I guess in the long run, you do have two for the "price" of one, so... lol... I guess that's a "bargain" :)

Your daughters look so sweet and lovely. :)

karin said...

Yeah, I hear ya! Life's not fair! My daughter's twins are boy & girl, but there's always that accusation among all four children - but that's not fair! Even Christ's disciples talked about things not being fair! Thanks for visiting my Welcome to Alberta post today!

Charity Childs-Gevero said...

you know...i have shared this in my what i'm reading box. :) That's where I share with others my fav posts by friends. :)

Jaime said...

This is something that I've often wondered about with my trio, but especially the two girls. I'm glad to hear that it's not that big of a deal. When did you begin separating them in school? Have a great day being saucy from a fellow SITSta and mother of multiples.

MammaDucky said...

My twins are little still, only 3, but the question of splitting them up has already come up at preschool. I feel they're still too young. Do you mind if I ask how old your girls were when you split them up? Do you think it was a good age? Thanks!

jennifersusan said...

I used to have the same dilemma with my older boys. My oldest two are almost exactly 2years apart, but were confused as twins for much of their younger lives. They did everything together, and when one went somewhere I always heard, "how come I can't go?". Now they are much older and never confused for twins and mostly just fight. Let the good times begin!

Lynn said...

Wow, really beautiful photos. Did you take them yourself? I am always looking for great nature photos for my site. I really like this post and congratulations of course on your day sitsa!

I knew AZ was good looking, but not THAT good looking! it is definitely still in the running for the family vacations spot this summer - there and Washington state are neck and neck now.
My best, Lynn

Stephanie said...

Your twins are cute! (even if the pic is 2 years old) There were twin girls that grew up across the street from us and they were the same way....EVERYTHING was done together for many years.

We don't have twins, but I agree that when they grow up in close quarters, you're always gonna hear, "But that's not fair!"

I enjoyed your post! I subscribed to your blog, too. :)

Have a Beautiful Day!