Sunday, October 24, 2010

The Novelty of Being a Twin

Something you don't really expect when you give birth to twins is being stopped by strangers everywhere you go & asked all sorts of questions. You get everything from; How did you get pregnant? (and I'm not kidding, I guess the assumption is you took fertility drugs, since you have more than one baby. I never really knew how to answer that question. Should I say, "Oh, just the normal way!" I mean even if I had taken fertility drugs, or used some other method, is it any of their business? Of course it isn't. Why would you ask someone you don't know that question anyway?!) And you'd always be asked which baby was born first? Are they identical? Are they the same sex? Even after telling people they are identical, they would then ask if they are boys, girls, or 1 of each? (to which I wanted to answer, if they are identical they would have to be the same sex, hence being "identical!" But I have a hard time being rude to someone just for being ignorant, though the temptation at times was great!) You'd be asked If you delivered vaginally or did you have to have a C section? (again that's a little too personal coming from a complete stranger don't you think?!)

My twins happen to be born just a month or so after the Mccaughey Septuplets made news headlines all around the world. And if I had a dime for every time I was asked "Aren't you glad you didn't have seven?!" well, let's just say, I could put my twins through collage! But worst of all were the questions, especially as the girls got bigger & could understand, were the ones like: Which one is the good twin? And which one is the bad twin? (or sometimes they would use the term evil twin) Which ones the boss? Which one is smarter, etc. I would still try not to be rude, but always say positive things about both of my daughters. Or let people know we try very hard not to compare our girls to each other, and we definitely don't label them. Neither is evil. They take turns being the boss, you get the picture. I remember one man kept on asking questions you should never be asked, especially by someone you've never met before, and I kept deflecting, & he kept on persisting, and he finally said something to the effect of how terrible & hard having twins would be, and the last straw was when he said "Glad they aren't mine!" to which I answered "yeah, so are they!" :) I just couldn't help it! I had held my tongue long enough.

Okay, so why am I reflecting on all this now you ask? And the answer to that question my friends is, because my twin little girls started Jr. High School this year. Makes sense? It does to me. Allow me to explain. My girls have been in the same elementary school from Kindergarten through 6th Grade. Some of those years they were in the same class room together, many of their grade school years were spent in separate classes. Yet, everyone pretty much knew everyone after that many years in the same school. So this year going into Jr. High, there are a ton of people they don't know & who don't know them. Everyone in Jr. High is pretty much in the same boat. It's a bigger school and lots of new kids. And as a surprise to them many of their peers are seeing twins as something novel.

My girls don't have any classes together, but they have many of the same teachers. So they will get called by their sisters name if that teacher had their sister in class earlier in the day. At lunch they were shocked to have kids they didn't even know come up to them and ask Are you guys Twins? And they almost always answer in unison, which people think is so funny. Erica had a girl she didn't know walk up to her & say "Hey Lexi, what is your sisters name?" unsure how to answer, Erica just said, "um I am Lexi's sister" to which the girl replied, something like "Really? That is so weird! What's your name?" :) And when one of my girls & her friends were talking, her sister came up in conversation, and a boy in line behind them said "Oh, your the twins, I've heard about you guys!" This is very strange for my girls. Of course they don't see what the big deal is. But I guess in Jr. High school standing out for any reason that might make people want to know you can be a good thing. I don't think they ever really thought about it before now, but maybe for the first time ever, they like the fact that they are a twin. And that, as their Mother, is a Novelty!


Dianna@KennedyAdventures said...

Your girls are absolutely STUNNING!! We'll have to chat, so that I know what I'm in for.

Dontcha love all the questions twins bring out in people? Somedays, I want to tell people, "No, they are just brothers." Ha! You can relate, I know.

Unknown said...

It's so cool how our girls are in the same grade and the same school. Are they the only twins in the family?

My sister has twins. They are the first in our family. She has a boy and a girl. It's a challenge and reward at the same time, I'm sure.