Thursday, November 17, 2011

Thankful Thursday: Quality Time

I remember being a young wife, after we had moved across the country & ending a day of my husband working late in tears, when he asked me what was wrong, I exclaimed "You don't Love me!" He was dumbfounded. "What are you talking about?" he asked. I responded with "You don't spend any time with me!" A light bulb went off over his head that night, that looked something like "I need to spend time with my wife in order for her to FEEL how much I love her!" We made sure we had Date Nights from them on.

A few years latter we discovered what would become one of my favorite Books of all time. It is called The Five Love Languages by: Dr. Gary Chapman. In this Book, Dr. Chapman tells us there are Five Love Languages (hence the name of the book!) :) They are how we give & receive love. And how we show others we love them & why we feel (or don't feel) loved. We need to speak all five of them to keep our spouses "Love Tank" full.

The Five Love Languages are: Physical Touch, Words of Affirmation, Acts of Service, Gifts & Quality Time. There are a few questions to help you uncover the Love Language of the people around you, as well as your own. Maybe your husband gives you flowers & your thinking I wish he'd just tell me he loves me, or just take the trash out with out me asking him too. Those are clues into his Love Language, as well as to yours. In short: Physical Touch means exactly what it sounds like, You need physical contact, the hugs & hand holding, etc. Words of Affirmation is needing to be told how much you are loved & appreciated. Acts of Service means you feel Loved through someone doing something for you. Gifts is you need tokens of someones love. And last but not least is Quality time . . .

My Love Language is Quality Time. I feel loved when someone spends time with me. (Remember my little story at the beginning?) Now I have always appreciated my husbands high work ethic, but I need TIME with him in order to feel loved. He realized that before we had ever read this book, which just confirmed what he already knew. Good Man! That's why things like Date Nights & Family Vacations are so important to me. To me Time = Love! We also discovered that his Love Language is Physical Touch. Unfortunately that is my least spoken Love Language, as I'm not a touchy feely type of person. I have had to literally remind myself to do things like hold my Husbands hand when we are walking together. Now it comes a little more naturally to me. :) But, let's get back to me! :)

You are probably wondering why I'm telling you all this in a Thankful Thursday post, right? Well it's because as you are reading this I am right now spending Quality Time with my Daughters & some friends of ours, standing in line all day for the Movie Premier of the newest film in the Twilight Saga, Breaking Dawn. That's right. My girls & I have a shared love for the Twilight Books & Movies. And we even went on a Twilight Tour in Forks, WA. this summer. I love spending time with my kids & this is something we love to do together! Quality Time! And I will forever treasure these memories of time spent together. Thankful for Quality Time with those I love & who love me.

I highly recommend the book The Five Love Languages. I give it regularly for wedding showers. It can & will improve your marriage. He has gone on to write The Five Love Languages of Teenagers & Children, (along with some others) Both are really good. We can all benefit from knowing how we & those around us receive Love, so we can speak to them in ways they not only understand, but benefit the greatest from. Today I encourage you to be Thankful for those around you & to spend some Quality Time with those you love the most.

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